What do I miss the most? You? Hell No! Something Bigger.....

It's been a while when I was spared by your sweet voice uttering those bitter words. Now my emotions have gone missing while your beauty caters the senses of those who were blessed to have a touch of your skin. They all said its joy, a lust, an addiction you can just never get tired of. But what would these poor souls know.

 I've been in this place before; your perfection would just mesmerize me. As if, every word you spoke was a charm of black magic taking over my mind, you would stare down a hole in my soul with your seductive gaze. Logic and science lose their existence and replaced by fantasies and delusions of perfection and one who re-defines it. Everything else becomes meaningless and objective of doing anything becomes one, to make these fantasy a reality. Your presence used to strike fear and nervousness mixed with elation and freedom in my heart. Like a walk on a tight rope with hell and heaven on either side. Every word delivered to your ears is measured in the depths of mind and simulated over and over till the perfect word you come up with is just a mere greeting. Rest is like a beautiful dream, but how can a dream come true you see, that was my ambition and as soon as you said those words, the dream lost it charm. Life became meaningless, as if millennia of hard labor and reward torn down to mere shreds, and can't blame it to you; your perfection would only make me hate myself even more.  But now you’ll ask me now if I felt so deep how I survived.

But whether I’m a coward of death or having a will to survive, I’m still breathing with my lungs which used to savor your sweet smell. But I confess that even though it’s been a few years, it seems like an eternity. But don't be mistaken my dear, my love for you is lost. You see, it wasn't you what I missed or what you do now has no effect on me. But is how you made me feel. Not you, but love itself.